Funny article about Parker (Suns mentioned)

[Greg Popovich]

Buck Harvey: Amare now, amour later? Eva tweaks


[SIZE=-1]Web Posted: 05/09/2007 10:59 PM CDT

[/SIZE]
[SIZE=-1]
San Antonio Express-News[/SIZE]

Tony Parker isn't marrying Eva Longoria. He's marrying Phil Jackson.
He's marrying someone who loves the stage and who doesn't mind having fun. Mostly, he's marrying someone who messes with his mind between playoff games.
advertisement

You must be registered for see images

OAS_AD('Bottom1');var zflag_nid="305"; var zflag_cid="36/1"; var zflag_sid="37"; var zflag_width="300"; var zflag_height="250"; var zflag_sz="9";

You must be registered for see images

She did last week, and Parker should laugh at Eva's latest public announcement about their love life, or, rather, their lack of one.
And?
He should wonder if Eva/Phil thinks a playoff adjustment, after Tuesday's loss, is now necessary.
For those who don't watch late-night TV or follow celebrity gossip, here's the gist: Last week Eva reportedly told talk-show host Jimmy Kimmel she was implementing a sex ban to keep Parker focused on the playoffs.
"Luckily," she said, "we're getting married after the playoffs, and then we need to consummate the marriage. I scheduled it that way."

Spurs vs. Suns• Ginobili can't locate basket
• Buck Harvey: Amare now, amour later? Eva tweaks
• Richard Oliver: Courtside: Still picking Spurs in six
• Suns 'break through,' then rest
• Notebook: Duncan says blowout loss minimized by opener win . . .• Spurs coming home tied after blowout loss
• Buck Harvey: Money time for the Sun$: Nash urgency
• Courtside: Richard Oliver's Game 2 observations
• Suns coverage: Arizona Republic
• Official Spurs page
• Official Suns page West semifinals• Game 1: Spurs 111, at Suns 106
• Game 2: at Suns 101, Spurs 81
• Game 3: at Spurs, 7 p.m. Sat., (ABC)
• Game 4: at Spurs, 8:30 p.m. Mon. (TNT)
• Game 5: at Suns, TBD May 16 (TNT)
• *Game 6: at Spurs, TBD May 18 (ESPN)
• *Game 7: at Phoenix, TBD May 20 (TBD)
* -- if necessary
Radio: WOAI-AM 1200, KCOR-AM 1350)

• First round: Spurs 4, Nuggets 1 Spurs MailbagGot a question about the Spurs? Use the form below and fire away!*Your name
*Your e-mail
Your hometown
*Your question

*Required​

Knowing Kimmel's man-show humor, this was a joke. And had Parker been sitting on stage with them, maybe he would have countered with the smart comeback.
Such as: I'm French, I'm a millionaire and I'm still single. I'm not sitting around by myself drinking Vitaminwater and waiting for the ban to be lifted.
Given that, Eva's latest publicity grab likely didn't have the same effect on Parker that a previous one did. When she said she was "the teacher" of love in their relationship, Parker was less than thrilled.
Hearing it broadcast internationally was one thing. Hearing it from his teammates in the locker room was another.
Parker had better get used to being pulled into the tabloids, because this is the life he has chosen to join, for better or for worse. There will be a time in the future, when one of her movies needs plugging, that she will tell the world about Parker's abundant nose hair and how silly he looks in saggy briefs. She might bring pictures.
Part of Parker must enjoy walking with her on the red carpet, and their wedding is part of that. Anyone who is anyone is seemingly invited, including Boris Diaw and the same Leandro Barbosa who accidentally flipped Parker on Tuesday night.
Also, Parker surely understands by now how outrageously silly her business can be. Celebrity chasers spotted her last week, for example, and they framed this as they do.
According to one, she spent "most of the night chillin' with her girlfriends, dancing and drinking champagne. Eva also made a stop by Leo's (DiCaprio) table to chat up the Hollywood hunks."
"Hollywood hunks" are good at chatting up. They couldn't post up an NBA trainer.
Some of the reports might grow tiresome for Parker, especially another bit of celebrity reporting. This site said Eva was at the De La Hoya-Mayweather fight with "pal" Mario Lopez. She was also at the "Mirage in Las Vegas, hugging it out with recently divorced basketball legend, Michael 'Air' Jordan."
"Hugging it out" with any other "recently divorced" male might not bother Parker. But Jordan, his boyhood idol?
Parker would have wanted to hang with Jordan, too.
It's Eva's abstinence strategy that makes news now, and there are some who have agreed with her in the past. One was Mick, the trainer in the "Rocky" movies, as played by Burgess Meredith.
Mick warned Rocky about Adrian. "You lay off that pet shop dame," he said. "Women weaken legs."
A.C. Green spent a career following that creed, and Shawn Kemp suspiciously spiraled downward as he began to go forth and multiply. But there's little scientific proof to support the pet-shop-dame theory.
If anything weakened Parker's legs Tuesday night, it was 6-foot-7 Shawn Marion chasing him around.
Buck Harvey MailbagGot a question for Buck Harvey? Use the form below and fire away!*Your name
*Your e-mail
Your hometown
*Your question

*Required​

Still, something inspired Parker in Game 1. Then, he scored 32 points on the Suns, and his legs were anything but weak. This was, coincidentally, after Eva appeared on Kimmel.
So Parker and the Spurs should ask one question today. After Mike D'Antoni made his playoff adjustment, starting Kurt Thomas, what's Eva's?

[email protected]

 

[Budden]

I hate when celebrities go on talk shows, have fun with the host, and talk about their lives. Longoria should have just answered "No comment." after Kimmel asked her a question, and she should have done so with a striaght face, almost to say 'Yeah, I'm rich and really hot, but I hate my life." That way, it'd make all the people who are somehow calling her some kind of media ***** for going on a talk show and talking about the things that everyone talks about on a talk show.

 

[Greg Popovich]

Unfortunately--Longoria is obsessed with publicity.

She is going to take Parker to the cleaners when they get divorced in a year or two.

 

[Gaddabout]

I can't feel sorry for Parker. He knew what he was getting into.

 

[F-Dog]

This can't be good for Tony's rap career.

 

[azirish]

This can't be good for Tony's rap career.

More like country western lyrics.