Mitch: "Leave it to the gays to raise the only under-achieving Asian in America."
Luke: "One second, I'm about to beat dad's record."
Phil: "You heard your mother!"
Cam: "What did she say?"
Mitch: "She says to buy her a Blackberry."
Cam: "Lilly doesn't have the dexterity for that Claire! What is happening?!"
Manny: "Who are you really mad at Larry? The dog or your wife?"
Larry: "Who the hell is this kid?"
Phil: "For the next week I may as well be Amish. Jedediah Dunphy. Raising barns, witnessing murders, making electric fireplace hearts."
lol @ Alex wanting a new computer, Haley wanting a new car, and Luke only wanting chicken pot pie.
Gloria killing the rat was awesome. Then heading straight to church.
Alex: "What's the difference between a gamete and a zygote."
Phil: "Don't fall for it Claire, she's just making up words."
Manny: "I like how Hemingway gets to the point."
Jay: "You like a lot of his stuff?"
Manny: "That was a hint Jay."
Cam: "Take a chance? That sounds chancy."
Manny: "Is that the rat shovel...Well let's do this quick. If she catches us we're as dead as that dog probably is...Don't call me a rat, she kills rats!"
Haley killed it at the end. That was so awesome. And Cam pretending to be a Native American at the end, haha.
Gloria: "No way he is going to my village. I was in two car accidents when I was leaving there. Both times I hit a goat. One was hurt pretty bad, but it was a good thing I had that shovel in the trunk."