OT: Adrian Peterson indicted in Child Injury Case

[crisper57]

Our purpose as a society should be to improve on the mistakes of our parents. So can we stop with all these "that's how I was raised" arguments?

I was spanked with a belt and to this day, I have the impulse to lash out violently at anyone who crosses me, including, but not limited to, those that cut me off in traffic.

I don't do it because I actually can control my impulses, but it scares me that my first thought to solving a problem is sometimes a violent rebuttal. That is what I was taught, after all.

Thanks, parents.

 

[dreamcastrocks]

Our purpose as a society should be to improve on the mistakes of our parents. So can we stop with all these "that's how I was raised" arguments?

I was spanked with a belt and to this day, I have the impulse to lash out violently at anyone who crosses me, including, but not limited to, those that cut me off in traffic.

I don't do it because I actually can control my impulses, but it scares me that my first thought to solving a problem is sometimes a violent rebuttal. That is what I was taught, after all.

Thanks, parents.

So you're willing to discuss the good things that your parents taught you but we should just stop talking about the bad ones?

 

[crisper57]

So you're willing to discuss the good things that your parents taught you but we should just stop talking about the bad ones?

No. I am just saying those arguments aren't valid. "The way things have been done" is the first sign of a losing argument.

 

[NJCardFan]

So whipping as a form of punishment is part of southern black culture??? That seems so incredibly messed up.

And quite ironic when you think about it.

 

[Covert Rain]

Our purpose as a society should be to improve on the mistakes of our parents. So can we stop with all these "that's how I was raised" arguments?

I was beat with a belt and to this day, I have the impulse to lash out violently at anyone who crosses me, including, but not limited to, those that cut me off in traffic.

I don't do it because I actually can control my impulses, but it scares me that my first thought to solving a problem is sometimes a violent rebuttal.

Thanks, parents.

Yep. Completely weak argument. Just because those in the past believed something to be OK doesn't mean it gets a pass in modern society. My father used to whip out the belt. Schools used to paddle children. People used to own slaves. That doesn't mean that owning slaves is subjectively OK.

My kids are well disciplined, are great kids and have a good sense of morality. I did that without inflicting physical whipping like my father gave me. Past cultural acceptance is no excuse or justification to hit a kid upside the head and cause a gash or whip him with a stick until he bleeds. We are not talking about little pats on the butt to scare a kid into behaving. We are talking about a beating. HUGE difference. Although some would argue any physical contact is just as bad.

 

[Azlen]

And quite ironic when you think about it.

Would hate to think it's part of southern black culture because it was the primary choice of punishment used by the slave owners in the south. Would like to think our methods of discipline have evolved since then.

 

[dreamcastrocks]

Yep. Completely weak argument. Just because those in the past believed something to be OK doesn't mean it gets a pass in modern society. My father used to whip out the belt. Schools used to paddle children. People used to own slaves. That doesn't mean that owning slaves is subjectively OK.

My kids are well disciplined, are great kids and have a good sense of morality. I did that without inflicting physical whipping like my father gave me. Past cultural acceptance is no excuse or justification to hit a kid upside the head and cause a gash or whip him with a stick until he bleeds. We are not talking about little pats on the butt to scare a kid into behaving. We are talking about a beating. HUGE difference. Although some would argue any physical contact is just as bad.

I'm glad that you have been able to raise your kids well. I think that mine are too. However, not every kid will respond with by a nice father/son chat or a heart to heart. Sometimes, physical discipline works. As a society, we shouldn't expect that all children are raised, and disciplined in the same way.

 

[Redneck Voodoo]

Would hate to think it's part of southern black culture because it was the primary choice of punishment used by the slave owners in the south. Would like to think our methods of discipline have evolved since then.

Yes. Well said.

Addendum: ...would like to think...

 

[Azlen]

I'm glad that you have been able to raise your kids well. I think that mine are too. However, not every kid will respond with by a nice father/son chat or a heart to heart. Sometimes, physical discipline works. As a society, we shouldn't expect that all children are raised, and disciplined in the same way.

This is a good article on the subject. Language used is NSFW

http://theconcourse.deadspin.com/why-do-people-hit-their-kids-1634802919?rev=1410879890009

Now, this is the part where I point out that study after study after study has proven that corporal punishment—even a light spanking—does not work. At all. Corporal punishment makes kids sullen, violent, and angry. I know this because I have dabbled in corporal punishment with my own children, particularly my oldest kid.

 

[crisper57]

ProFootballTalk ‏@ProFootballTalk 37s
Don't be surprised if Vikings reverse course on letting Adrian Peterson play this Sunday. Hearing that Monday's decision could change.

Do you get the sense that NFL teams are like disobedient children, testing just how far they can get away with?

 

[Covert Rain]

I'm glad that you have been able to raise your kids well. I think that mine are too. However, not every kid will respond with by a nice father/son chat or a heart to heart. Sometimes, physical discipline works. As a society, we shouldn't expect that all children are raised, and disciplined in the same way.

You are oversimplifying and I am not suggesting that. I use several different forms of punishment and not just heart to hearts. There are a ton of studies that show that non-violent punishment can be just as if not more effective than physical punishment.

There are many tools and techniques because as you stated not every kids reacts the same way. There are always going to be some kids that don't respond to any type of punishment. I acknowledge that. However, if you have to subjugate your kids to a beating to get him to listen? I bet there are other factors going on there. In fact, I would bet the kid is learning fear more than any lesson you trying to teach them.

I don't think anybody is saying that physical discipline doesn't work and I am not even suggesting that parents that pat their kids on the butt once in awhile are abusers. Only that their are lots of ways to attack problems that are effective. It doesn't always mean some of those tactics are the right ones. If this was really about "end results" there would be alot of hideous things we could justify.

I think there is a line where it's no longer discipline and becomes abuse.

 

[Cbus cardsfan]

DCR makes the most sense out of anyone in this thread. Like me, it seems he doesn't condone the beating but understands there are different mentalities when it comes to discipline.

I think it's pretty easy to sit behind a keyboard and be outraged when we really know nothing behind the culture of how different people live.

Like I said, I'm not defending AP, he went over the line. But, if there was no blood, or pictures, there would be nary a word from anyone. However there is, and he'll pay his punishment for it. Remember, the first grand jury didn't even indict him and I'm sure they were presented with all the evidence.

Also, Keith Olberman is an ass. I don't care what he says about anything. What give his opinion any more validity than Barkley? Because he agrees with your point of view?

 

[crisper57]

There are a ton of studies that show that non-violent punishment can be just as if not more effective than physical punishment.

However, those studies fail to mention that a good beating allows you to check out as a parent. No follow-up necessary. No life lessons to communicate. Quick, clean, and then it is over...for the parent at least.

 

[crisper57]

Also, Keith Olberman is an ass. I don't care what he says about anything. What give his opinion any more validity than Barkley? Because he agrees with your point of view?

You are so right. I don't like his politics, so he can never be right about anything.

 

[Cbus cardsfan]

You are so right. I don't like his politics, so he can never be right about anything.

Like politics, if a blowhard in the media agree with a person's line of thinking, they think that person is right and everyone else is wrong.

 

[crisper57]

Like politics, if a blowhard in the media agree with a person's line of thinking, they think that person is right and everyone else is wrong.

Keith Olbermann ‏@KeithOlbermann 32s
VIDEO: My special guest, 6 Gold Medals, now inspiration, and we co-starred in a SportsCenter spot
@amyvandyken http://j.mp/1woxjLX

You are right. He's an ass.

 

[Covert Rain]

I just want to make it clear I am not saying that parents that occasionally spank their kids are abusers. I don't believe that for one second. Only that I believe there is a very short leash when it comes to that in modern society. AP crossed that line by a miles....allegedly with two different kids.

 

[crisper57]

http://abcnews.go.com/US/reggie-bush-harshly-discipline-year-daughter/story?id=25537109

"I most definitely discipline my daughter. I have a 1-year-old daughter, and I discipline her," he said. "Obviously, every person is different. I definitely will use my best judgment to discipline her depending on the situation, on what happens. I definitely will try to, will obviously not leave bruises or anything like that on her. But I definitely will discipline her harshly depending on, again, on what the situation is."

Why, Reggie?

 

[Cbus cardsfan]

You are right. He's an ass.

. I don't get it.

 

[Darkside]

Do you get the sense that NFL teams are like disobedient children, testing just how far they can get away with?

Totally. At first they're like oh a stern warning, scary, let's hug it out. Then they be all oh **** he's going for the paddle, better suspend him one game. Finally they're all oh ****, he's going for the tree branch, suspended indefinately.

Wait, whut?


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[dreamcastrocks]

http://abcnews.go.com/US/reggie-bush-harshly-discipline-year-daughter/story?id=25537109



Why, Reggie?

What did he say that was wrong? Sure the timing isn't the best, but if there is someone asking about it...... Would you rather he lie? Say nothing at all?

 

[crisper57]

What did he say that was wrong? Sure the timing isn't the best, but if there is someone asking about it...... Would you rather he lie? Say nothing at all?

The timing. Just 'no comment' and move on. Just...dumb.

 

[Covert Rain]

http://abcnews.go.com/US/reggie-bush-harshly-discipline-year-daughter/story?id=25537109
Why, Reggie?

I think Cheesebeef mentioned that. CULTURE. It sounds like he is saying.."hey...I won't try to leave any bruises but I will do what I have to do to discipline her".

If that is what he is saying...that isn't OK but I am not sure that is what he is saying based on small sound bite. If it is...just shows the ignorance on his part.

 

[Darkside]

What did he say that was wrong? Sure the timing isn't the best, but if there is someone asking about it...... Would you rather he lie? Say nothing at all?

I think it's asinine. How can you call it discipline at 1 year old? At 1 you aren't even forming memories yet man, there's nothing to learn from.

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[dreamcastrocks]

The timing. Just 'no comment' and move on. Just...dumb.