There is no way you'll ever be ok with Sarver because you're more interested in believing rumors than actual facts. There hasn't been any facts about Budenholzer passing on the coaching position but you choose to latch onto the narrative that makes Sarver look the worst, even though that has not been proven.
The Suns said they would do a large and comprehensive coaching search, casting a wide net, and interview a lot of candidates. I feel comfortable saying some people would be upset that the Suns didn't look at enough people before making their choice. If he was hired, or offered the job, then that would have been
Budenholzer was the first interview reported. If he was hired, or offered the job, then that would have been McD and Sarver going back on their word about doing an exhaustive coaching search. It's ok that it didn't work out, I wish we knew more as to why it didn't, but we can't stay in the past and think "what if" for a coach who was coming off of a poor season coaching another team in the East.
Budenholzer was not the top candidate available or the Suns top choice, there's no indication that was the case. Had he been, I believe they would have pushed harder. It's a possibility that he said "no thanks" to McD and James Jones on Monday and Sarver tried getting him on board the next day. That is a possibility just like your assumption that Sarver drove him off, we don't know. He is someone who wasn't known to be available until we got the OK to interview him from Atlanta. It would have been setting us up for disappointment and failure if we set the top coaching choice to be someone who was under contract to another team with 2 more years on their deal. He just came off a 24 win season, just barely edged out by the Suns for worst record. That doesn't say "#1 candidate" to me.