Originally posted by Brian in Mesa
When did he say he did nothing wrong is my question? All I ever heard or saw printed was that he said he was innocent of what he was being charged with, and that anyone who knew him knew that he did not do "what they say I did" (sexual assault). When did he ever say - "I did not have sexual relations with that woman."? (Hmmm...that sounds familiar, but I think some other loser of a cheating creep said it).
UGH, you're making me feel sick, like I am actually defending what Kobe said. Stop it.
Still, I think in a huge case like this we should all know the facts. Too often someone throws something out there without anything to back it up.
Do you have a link to an article where Kobe denies having sex with the girl, or doing ANYTHING wrong? Something besides denying the charges...
July 19 — This isn’t about morality or crime. I’ll let others better qualified than I in both departments to sort that out. It’s about doing the right thing after you’ve been caught doing the wrong thing. It wasn’t that long ago, just a week, since Kobe Bryant asked us to think about what we know of him and to agree with him that he would never do “anything like that.”
HE DIDN’T USE the words “rape” or “sexual assault” or any other qualifier, leaving us to conclude that he meant he wouldn’t have sex with a woman not his wife.
Rather Clintonesque of him, wasn’t it? And because he’s someone whose skills we greatly admire; because he’s handsome and polite and has always been well-behaved; because he’s a man who has never been touched by the breath of scandal, we wanted to believe that.
Or, more to the point, he wanted us to believe that. And that would be understandable in many circumstances. No one who enjoys a squeaky-clean image and who has been cheating on his or her spouse wants that reputation sullied, especially when there is an aggrieved spouse to answer to.
But now, with charges of felony rape filed against him by a Colorado prosecutor, Bryant has changed his story. OK, he has admitted. He did have sex with that woman. He made the “mistake” of adultery. But she was a willing participant. He didn’t rape her.
His credibility disappeared with that admission. He is in full defensive mode now, responding to revelations, trying to control damage that can’t be controlled. He’s like the captain of the Titanic sending a crewman below to stuff a blanket in the hull to stop the water from coming in. It’s not going to work.
And if this were merely a case of infidelity, it wouldn’t be that big a deal to the world at large. But this is a case of alleged rape, one of the most reviled of crimes. It is a case that will hinge on “he said, she said,” and in such cases, credibility is everything. And Bryant has already given his away.
He did the wrong thing, and then he did the wrong thing again.
Right now, we can’t be sure of what Kobe Bryant would or wouldn’t do. And it’s all because of the way he handled himself when the story first surfaced that he called for room service and got more than a bacon cheeseburger and curly fries.
The 19-year-old woman accusing him of rape reported the incident almost immediately. She went to a hospital to have evidence collected, and Bryant was taken to the hospital for the same purpose.
He’s a smart man, despite not having gone to college, and he had to know when he went to the hospital that there was no denying that he and the woman had exchanged bodily fluids, whether by mutual consent or not. At the moment he turned over his DNA, the game was up and there was only one thing to do — stand up and take his lumps.
We may understand his reluctance to admit to his young wife, the mother of his child, that he stumbled off the matrimonial path. But he did what he did, and the fact that most athletes do the same — at least one unscientific survey has said the majority of male athletes cheat on their spouses — that’s beside the point. When you engage in risky behavior, sometimes you’re going to get called on it. And when you are as famous and rich and successful as he is, the media are going to be on you like tan on a lifeguard.
Bryant got caught doing the wrong thing, even if it is as common a sin as filching a pen from the office stationery cabinet. At that point, with the evidence in baggies and vials in a crime lab, there was nothing for him to do but admit it. That’s what a responsible man or woman who has acted irresponsibly does. It’s not easy to do, but it has to be done.
The day after he arrived back in Los Angeles, Kobe should have stood up, swallowed hard, and said, “I sinned, and I’m sorry.”
Another way to put it might have been: “I am truly ashamed to say I cheated on my wife, whom I love more than anything in the world. What I did was inexcusable, and I can only hope and pray that, in time, she will find it in her heart to forgive me.”
And then, if it is his contention that whatever happened in the resort room was agreed upon by both participants, he should have added: “But I did not force the woman to have sex. I don’t know why she is saying I did, but anything that happened between us was consensual.”
We might have believed him then, and we might not have believed his accuser. Again, I am not making judgments here that only a court can make. I know little about his accuser other than that she is young and had dreams of being a star and is either very brave or very naïve or maybe both.
But I do know how these things work in court, where justice can be little more than a distant ideal, unapproachable in such cases. And I know how we all react when a hero stands before us and denies everything, then, a week later, admits to part of the accusation but not to the other part.
Such behavior nearly ended a presidency, and Clinton was not accused of rape. Surely, Bryant remembered that. Surely, he should have known that he could not deny the best physical evidence that exists — his own genetic fingerprint.
Perception is everything in these cases, and right now, the perception is that Kobe Bryant is not the wonderful person we all thought he was, even if he made a mistake that better men than he have made before and will again. It is that he is a liar trying to save a life of fame and wealth and a reputation of exemplary behavior.
That is the perception. None of us except he and the woman know the reality, and it’s guaranteed that they will never agree even on that. People can see consent where none existed in the mind of the other.
That is all for a jury to decide, and good luck to the unlucky panel that tries to sort it all out. A preliminary hearing is scheduled for August and the trial will follow at a date to be determined. Bryant has a lot of time and a lot of money to organize his defense. But he’s started it badly. Very badly.
http://msnbc.com/news/941255.asp
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